Striving for Positivity

Awhile ago I read this Buddhist philosophy that one must accept suffering. Not in that we need to be resigned to the suffering and give up, (especially of others)but rather just accept that no matter what we do, living involves some suffering... No matter how hard we try, we might get sick, or lose a job, or have a hard time financially... it is bound to happen as part of life. Once you can accept that suffering is going to happen at some time, then you don't need to dwell on it.

I really like this idea, especially as someone who is going through a hard time. I have found that the more I remind myself of that, the easier it is to see through the difficulties, and be able to concentrate on the positives that are happening in life. I have been working really hard to try to incorporate this mind-set into my life.

But seeing as how there is a lot of stuff in my life that is difficult right now, it's really quite a challenge. I think the most challenging thing is living with my parents again. At age 27, it's hard enough to live with your parents. But coming back here, I have noticed how hard it is to strive for positivity when you are surrounded by family who is often dwelling on the negative.

I wonder if anyone else has an ideas of how to deal with this? It is already a struggle for me to strive for positivity while being unemployed, very poor, living at home, and half way around the world from the person I want most to be with. So now, how do I deal living with my parents and sister, who are often prone to dwelling on the tiniest things.

I wonder the right way (if there is a way)to try an encourage family members to strive for positivity too... I think my methods of a.) pointing out how negative they are being doesn't work (since now you are complaining!) or b.) pointing out that most people in the world, for example, don't have a dish washer to complain about don't seem to work.

I don't want to come off haughty, or to be complaining about complaining... so how DOES one encourage others not to (ahem) drag me down into negativity land?

Depressed.

Sigh.

OK, okay. I know. But, it is so hard to be away from the one you love. I miss him so.

And this weather... it seems to be a never-ending snowstorm. I could do for a little sunshine.

And jobs? Don't even start. I have been applying for you jobs since September. You do the math... well you don't have to.. that's SIX months of job applications, without fruitful result. I went from applying for jobs that have to do with my (almost received) masters degree, to applying for jobs that pay decently, to applying for any and ALL jobs I can find. And I still don't have a job. Not even a quickie-mart job or anything. And, I have all this education and training and experience. I just want to put it to use.

I am doing a really great internship during this time. Which is nice, and experience. But, the thing that I really need at the moment is money. If I just had some kind of paying job, I could at least work on paying off my bills.

Lack of money is keeping me from Vivek. I feel like I want to start my 'grown-up' life, with my love, with my degree, and instead I am just in kid-land, penniless in my parents house.



So sigh. Yes, I am depressed. But, I'm still not just going to sit here!

....drum roll please!

here he is... my new cousin Nathan:


Being held by his big brother